The new SEGA trademarked “Yakuza Wars” probably isn't a Total War: Like A Dragon game, but let's speculate wildly anyway

Yesterday, Gematsu reported that SEGA has filed a trademark application for the term “Yakuza Wars” in Japan. This was on July 26th, and while Gematsu speculates that it may be related to the next game in the Yakuza: Like A Dragon series, I have other plans for the fictional game. I have nothing to do with it.

SEGA is also the parent company of Total War studio Creative Assembly, which earlier this year released a survey to fans about possible settings they wanted to see for the strategy series. The Lord of the Rings and Marvel were among the options, along with a rumored Star Wars in development. Ah, I said. Why bother with all those expensive, obvious options when the real answer is right in front of you the whole time? Then I realized Total War: Crazy Taxi was going to be a disaster, so I pinned my hopes on the next best thing.

The concept is fertile, and the basics are already present in the Yakuza games. I imagine something like Yakuza 0’s Real Estate Royale, where settlements are different parts of Kamurocho, provinces are entire streets, and individual buildings represent different specialties. Want to hire some high-level thugs? Build a soap country. Want to raise money? Casino. Need a little morale boost before going to war? Build a SEGA arcade and let your men play Space Harrier, then buy them some Takoyaki. In fact, Takoyaki can be its own resource. A Takoyaki-based economy. Practical. Delicious.

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Public order could be embodied as a system of extortion where you 'tax' the locals. Diplomacy writes itself. The biggest obstacle to making this sort of thing work is scale, but the Total War series has always been a bit inconsistent on that front anyway, and I see no reason why the car parks and streets of Kamurocho couldn't be magically altered on a whim to allow 2000 men to hit each other with baseball bats. Of course, you'll be able to slot in the series' rotating cast of villains as heroes, commanders and other special units. And if you've worked with Twarhammer's magic system, there's no reason you can't throw in Like A Dragon's summoning system, the Poundmates, in there too.

Again, this is just me taking the weakest themes and spinning a magnificent web of sheer nonsense out of it. It's probably just a mobile game, maybe a rushed release to capitalize on the upcoming TV Show, or something to do with the Japan-only Ryu Ga Gotoku Online. It's also possible that RGG doesn't want to dump the series on the dark side of the Steam workshop, where mods will no doubt be available within the week to create an army of differently costumed Majimas. I guess I'll just keep hoping Yakuza Empire turns out well.

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