“Spell words with over 25 different letters” as you travel through “Yorkshire-esque” locations in puzzle RPG Sternly Worded Adventures

There’s nothing more magical than the illuminated inscriptions of the intricate seals needed to spell out places like Ainderby Quernhow, Weedley Copse, or Upper Poppleton. A shiny whippet to the first person who can correctly identify which of these are real and which are invented for the “roguelite word puzzle RPG” Sternly Worded Adventures. Actually, forget about that. I’m not made of whippets, and you can easily find out via the Steam demo. I think you should, because “I killed a slime by spelling the word Toblerone” is easily one of my top ten gaming moments of the year.

Wait. What?! What do you mean 'Toblerone' isn't a word?

I was denied my rightful victory in Sternly Worded Adventures.

Image credit: Balthazar

Bloody disgrace, that's what it is. Let me show you the harsh language, my friend. The game describes itself as such. Yet, as we've mentioned before, the truth doesn't shy away from lying to your face.

Sternly Worded Adventures is a roguelite word puzzle RPG inspired by Bookworm Adventures, where you travel across a wooded peninsula with place names evocative of Yorkshire, battling monsters with the power of words to uncover the dark secrets that lurk beyond.

The game also offers 8+ different classes, 15+ enemies, 180+ items, and the chance to “spell words with 25+ different letters.” That last one took me a second but I actually forgive the Toblerone insult now.

The demo itself seems pretty generous, giving you a good chunk of adventure and “full access” [to] “Unlimited mini-games inspired by Wordle and Minesweeper.” I'm a big fan of Wordle, even though I've never played it, because it makes me complain about my Toblerones.

Of course, I couldn't finish this article without a comment from Yorkshire resident Edwin. Here's what he had to say about the game that made a mockery of the good people of Wigglesworth: “Wigglesworth is in North Yorkshire, in the Oop, the northernmost counties of England – Durham, Cumbria and Northumberland don't count because they've been overrun by Scots and turned into factories for the decrepit Mars Bars, not to mention Tyne & Wear, which looks like a brand of shaving foam. I lived on the North Yorkshire border when I was a kid. We didn't have Toblerones in those days, just bits of dry stone wall wrapped in foil, and if we saw a booger going across the green we'd eat it. This game looks as stupid as a paintbrush.”

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